Tuesday, February 6, 2018

Unfinished business. Call NOW.


If you live in our part of Kansas and you've ever watched anything on TV there is 100% chance that when you hear the phrase "call NOW" you think of one person.  Jerry O'Neal.  Continental Siding company.  You may not remember his company name but you cannot forget, no matter how hard you try, the sound of his voice saying "call NOW".  

Like multiple millions of folks across our nation I watched the big post-Super Bowl episode of This Is Us.  Perhaps you did, too.  It's easy for me to relate to the three siblings in this show who lost their dad at age 17.  The pain they experienced really struck a familiar chord with me.    I can say from experience that it is not possible to lose a parent when you're a teenager without having an abundance of unfinished business.  

And I know that this unfinished business scenario isn't limited to teenagers losing a parent.  Someone very very close to me lost his father quite suddenly several years ago. Though most of his family was able to be at their father's bedside in the hospital, communication was one-sided at best.  Dad was gone.  

Grieving is difficult enough without the pain of unfinished business.  Words left unsaid.  

I believe that anyone who has experienced such a loss would adamantly offer the same advice as Jerry O'Neal.  Call NOW.  Say what you need to say to those you love.   Can I get an amen?  Death is final and quite often unexpected.   And there will never be another chance to say what needs to be said.  That's a harsh truth, and I'm not sure you can grasp the depth of the pain involved unless you've been through it.  

Trust me, it's an experience you do not want to ever have.  

Let those of us who have been there gently urge you to say what you need to say while you still can.  Love while you still have them near.  Forgive them before it's too late.   "Too late" is a really dark place to be.  

I can also tell you from experience that healing is possible in times of deeply painful losses.  But there's no magic formula or quick fix. It can take a long time, and what might seem to be an ocean of tears.   

The solution?  Only Jesus.  Healing is his specialty.  His love for you is unending.  Forgiveness is yours before you even ask.  And the grace he gives is so much more than amazing.  He is a friend like no other.  

In my own experience I really struggled with regrets over what I didn't say to my dad, what I didn't hear from my dad.  After quite some time I knew my thought patterns desperately needed to change.  Not an easy task but through prayer I felt led to "find the good" (Phillipians 4:8).   I found a quiet place and wrote down every good memory I had of my dad.  It took time, and tears.  And it helped.  A lot. Thinking back on the good times helped me in a way to "hear" my dad say he loved me.  The good memories were saturated with evidence of our love.  My focus changed from regret to peace.  Plus I had the good times documented in writing to refer back to during difficult days.  This was the real-life practical way that Jesus helped me through my unfinished business.  

Speaking of unfinished business, do you have unfinished business with Jesus?  The remedy is so very simple!!  Jesus came to this world so that those who believe in Him would have eternal life in heaven.  Accept His love and forgiveness, it's there for the asking.   And He says to you "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest for your soul." Matt 11:28.  It's a decision you'll never regret.  

Well....I have to say it..... call NOW.  


One of my favorite places to call on God.



1 comment: